Golden Fan (Haibun)

This was my favorite fan… During menopause. Whenever hot flashes would arise – – I'd stand up peacock and wave a golden fan.

The sweat would pour down my face, roll down my chest, drip down and in circle, my nipples, and halt right there like a dripping, nursing goddess.

What a surge made you feel like something was really happening

And that Dewey flushed glow on your face – – like you just finished having – – oh, yes.

Well, now it's over. I miss those flashes of instant recognition and instant self-awareness. Now I'm on another phase.

Look. . .
A new moon
Rising